my nature.

Errm..been a while. Things happened. Feelings changed (?). Thoughts wander and wonder.

I have my doubts and downs weeks ago. Serious sadness, hopeless, devastated, longing--endless longing, ooh crappy situation. I tried different things to sooth things out, from spiritual healing to physical satisfaction.

Main reason is I get weary and super anxious when I want and need something so friggin bad yet its difficult to achieve (nearly impossible) and it cause me major moodswing. Hate it. Dang!

Good thing is, not long after that I got so busy and caught up in routines. Like 9-5 activity so when I got home, I'm all tired, I dont have the time to think and feel about all that bullshit. Plus, I got myself surrounded by bunch of friends the whole week. What more could I ask :) :)

I'm attending seminars from artists who produce great, awesome artworks that week and it got me inspired. I dont know what will I become but I know, those things, those crappy feelings is nothing but worthless. I mean, hey, theres a lot more in your life than that. A lot more bigger things I can pursuit.

Okey, I forgot what to write.

Mmm anyways, yeah I still forgot what to write. I was in the shower hours ago, and my mind wandered off to God knows where, and this ideas, this words come rushing to my brain making up sentences, random random sentences. Basically motivation and facts, do's and dont's, but when I'm all set sitting nicely with a laptop in front of me, ready to share and put everything back in words, my mind goes..blank.

Why is that?!

Ooh well, I'll continue when I remember. Adios.

ps: you'll probably wonder whats with the title. Yeah dont ask, I have no idea either.

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